I'll be here all week!

Tonight at dinner, I was hilarious. The thighs, they were being slapped! Because the wit, she sparkled! And the mouth, she opened to play show with the baked potato!

My family? Is a beautiful audience. And nothing gets them like a good see-food dinner.

In fact, my daughter a/k/a My Toughest Critic, told me that she thought I should quit my job as an opera singer and become a comedienne.

These are words of high praise. I mean, usually she hates me. And when I make a funny, she has this way of twisting her mouth to prove that she's not laughing. And yet, here she was, advising me to switch careers.

I would totally do it, too. If I had a job as an opera singer.