Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Well we got no class / And we got no principles / And we got no innocence / We can't even think of a word that rhymes / so we'll stick in a recipe.

School's Out for Summer. Today was the last day.

The kids were only at school for an hour. One hour. Why do schools do these things? I joked to my son when I dropped him off this morning that I had time to go home, drink a cup of tea, and go back to get him. At least, it started as a joke, but it turned out to be a prediction. I was just finishing the morning paper, looked at the clock, and whoops, it was time to go get the kids.

Oh--and yesterday? Was a Teacher's Institute Day. So we didn't have school. Other than play Nintendo, yesterday we did--gift bags. My daughter, I'm afraid, didn't really understand the principle, so we gave bags to all her teachers from Junior Kindergarten to Third Grade. My son has a lot of Special Ed-type helpers, none of whom I had ever heard mentioned until last night, but as far as he was concerned, they all deserved a bag.

So we bought, and I stuffed: ten bright red bags with coordinating red tissue paper and big shiny red bows; 11 purple bags with purple tissue and purple bows.

Isn't it lucky that I had exactly 42, count 'em, 42 boxes of Gevalia coffee to put in the bags? All because my husband and I are too lame to cancel our monthly delivery even after we switched to tea. I call that serendipity.

Each bag also got half a dozen home-made cookies. My daughter and I tweaked the recipe from Baker's Chocolate, so I'll provide it here. This is the cookie version of a brownie, or maybe a truffle. Or maybe flourless chocolate cake. This is--seriously--a lot of chocolate. So I'll call them

Almost Flourless Quadruple Chocolate Chunk Cookies

8 ounces of Semi-Sweet Baking Chocolate (60 percent, if you have it)
3 ounces of Unsweetened Baking Chocolate
6 ounces of White Baking Chocolate, coarsely chopped into chips/chunks
12 ounces of Semi-Sweet chocolate morsels
1 stick of butter
3 eggs
1 and 1/4 cups granulated sugar
2 tsp. vanilla
2/3 cup flour
1/2 tsp. Baking Powder
1/4 tsp. salt

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Put the unsweetened chocolate, semi-sweet chocolate, and the butter in a large microwave-safe bowl. Zap for two minutes, stir, and zap for another minute. Stir. Maybe zap again for a minute. Stir until completely smooth. Cool while you prepare the rest of the ingredients.

Beat eggs and sugar in large bowl with electric mixer until very well blended. Pour in chocolate and butter mixture and vanilla. Mix well. Blend in flour, baking powder, and salt. Sir in white chocolate chunks and semi-sweet chips until well mixed.

Drop by rounded tablespoons onto greased baking sheets.

Bake for 10-12 minutes. Cookies should still be moist, but not gooey. Cool on the pan for a few minutes. Remove from baking sheets and cool completely.

Note: because there is no liquid except for melted butter, melted chocolate, and egg yolks, you'll find as the batter sits, it starts to become increasingly solid. So for the last two batches, I roll the batter into balls before placing them on the cookie sheet. This keeps the cookies attractive.

I don't want to brag, but these are truly amazing. And I don't even like chocolate all that much. I mean, I like it, but it's not a substitute for sex or anything like that.

Yesterday I doubled the recipe, so much chocolate was unwrapped and melted or chopped. Yes, I should have taken pictures, either of the cookies being made or of the Teletubbie-colored gift bags, but once again, the battery on the digital camera was dead.

We had a mad rush to get to school this morning, carrying the 21 gift bags. There were too many to carry, so I went over early and dropped two big trays of gift bags off, then went home to get my kids and take them around to distribute the bags. The teachers were very touched; I think a lot of them were very surprised. (Especially the kindergarten teachers.)

In other news, one of the other mothers told me this morning that she had six girls in my son's class over at her house yesterday, and they voted for their favorite boy. My son was the winner.

This might be my last peaceful summer.


  1. Two very important notes.

    1. I really don't care about chocolate either. I mean I like it, but...

    2. Your son, the favorite boy? made me cry a little.

    no - wait, three things (NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION)

    3. I think, you and I, separately of course,and I am not implying that our husbands don't want to, are the only two people who are still interested in having sex.

    And I'll just leave it at that.

  2. 3. Wink, wink; nudge, nudge; SAY NO MORE.

  3. Oh, the FAVORITE BOY?! That made the entire year bearable, didn't it?! Please tell me it did, as I am smarting from seeing my beautiful Youngest never getting picked for this and that, and praying that he is still not noticing. And telling myself it's because that he is only Just Five, very quiet and keeps to himself; not that he's got the Repel Aura, or something...

    And the Brownie Cookies? Sound very yummy.

    But mostly? The very touching gifts you prepared for the teachers and helpers. That was a very very good thing to do.

  4. Going 140mph comes close.

    But only.


    P.S. Poppy will recall the balcony scene in FL with NOS and her son. "Over here, baby!"

  5. Not the ONLY two.

    And that's all I'M sayin'.

  6. Ha! My husband looked forward to the 6 weeks after the baby was born so he could rest. My kids give teacher gifts as well. The last day of school my younger came home in tears. The long awaited for last day of school and she found herself not ready for it to be over.


    Yay for the favored boy and his cookie bakin' mom!
    Bono's teacher sucked royally in the end (Why send a note home requesting sunscreen for field day AND LET THEN LET THE KIDS FUCKING BURN?! Also, why not tell me my kid wasn't in the yearbook because of your fuck up instead of letting me find it out later after the tiniest bit of detective work?!) so I kept the gift cards I bought her and her sidekick/aide.


Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.