I live with That Stud Muffin I Married, our 11-year-old son, our nine-year-old daughter, and my son's Malayan box turtle.
Many people consider me a Stay at Home Mooch, because while I don't work for a living, my husband does.
However, I prefer to think of myself as a housewife. (There. I said the "h" word. How boldly outspoken of me! I'm the Lenny Bruce of mommybloggers!)
But see, I really spend quite a bit of time keeping house. Or more accurately, thinking about keeping house. Once my children are safely at school, I can spend hours obsessing about interior decorating. I have a library of books that allow me to learn about outdated housekeeping practices (if you ever need to learn how to iron a bra, let me know.) I also have a lot of antique cookbooks (if I let it, it could be a real cream-of-mushroom soup-arama around here). Basically, I'm a font of knowledge about things nobody has cared about since your grandmother was in Home Ec class.
Yet I'm no Martha Stewart, or even a wannabe. I don't actually do much Good Housekeeping, I just read about it a lot. (I do manage to do some tidying up. And laundry. Lots of laundry.)
Before I started spending all my time dusting and then vacuuming (never the other way around) I was a graduate student in English Literature. For over a decade. Well over a decade. Being A.B.D. for almost 10 years capped a brilliant career that consisted of every loserish, slacker job ever invented (except maybe Starbucks barrista, because that hadn't been invented yet). I was a waitress, a secretary, I taught English to high school and college students, I temped, I processed dental insurance claims, and, in my best job ever, helped stupid computer users in the Biology department at MIT. Basically, where'er I walked, I flirted with failure.
Despite my efforts to persevere in my splendid career, I got promoted. In order to maintain my slacker status, I was forced to quit that job. I moved to Chicago, and while I was at it, robbed the cradle married the cutest MIT alumnus in the world. Then (much later) we had kids. Who are either high-functioning autistic or have Asperger's syndrome. Or something. No one is precisely sure what's going on, but all are agreed that something is off, neurobehaviorally speaking. All I know is that for me, child-rearing involves lots of testing, IEP meetings, therapy, and worry.
So--even if from a certain distance, I look like a soccer mom--I'm not. I don't foresee myself spending much time watching my kids playing soccer.
In this blog, I'm doing my best to portray the humorous side of my world, which is so often overwhelmingly about kids with special needs. (I know what you're thinking; what fun!)
And guess what? My husband and I have both been diagnosed with depression. But I figure you guessed that, already, didn't you? After all, this is a blog. I am a mother. Which means I'm a mommyblogger. It goes without saying that I'm mental--except that since it's my blog, I thought I'd say it anyway.
Also, I just outed my husband. How's that for telling it like it is? Take that, dooce! I can be confessional, too.
I like blogging, MST3K, Hollywood films of the 1930s, British humor, singing, Emily Post, early music, New England, the Patrick O'Brien Aubrey/Maturin novels, disco, Elsie de Wolfe, gardening, E. F. Benson, roses, Groucho Marx, Dorothy Draper, P. G. Wodehouse, engraved stationery, the Episcopal church, Lord Peter Wimsey, the Boston Red Sox, Georgette Heyer, opera, and cocktails. Not necessarily in that order.
This is ABSOLUTELY
ReplyDeleteTHE BEST
More about Poppy
page I have ever read.
Well, we love you ANYWAY.
ReplyDeleteWell, you're not really a mommyblogger because most of them are always puffing about how great their kids are and you left out how your kids are extremely attractive, very intelligent, funny, and well-mannered.
ReplyDeleteFiddledeedee
Fiddledeedee:
ReplyDeleteYou forgot annoying.
Heh heh heh.
Poppy, you have your life story down! As always, consider me most impressed.
ReplyDeleteNow that I've buttered you up, why is the black & white checkered pattern directly above "The Opiate of the Masses" cut out in this cauliflower-y shape? I've been wondering about this for some time now.
Well, I'm not the designer.
ReplyDeleteBut I always thought that Felix boldly bursting through the black and white checks symbolized the way that Poppy Buxom, intrepid blogger, bursts through outdated ideas, bourgeois expectations, and my jeans.
hehe
ReplyDeletehilariously interesting
good take on mommybloggers too.
was wondering about that black cat on the top previously... ;)
Guess I missed this in OCTOBER, but yes, a very good and funny autobiog.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE reading the first post - especially the first post for a blog that has been going for years and I have to tell you that yours takes the top spot. It is so confident, perceptive and funny. It is almost as though you dived in at the deep end and discovered you could do butterfly stroke immediately. The only problem is that commits me to reading the next 4 years of posts. I may be here a little while.
ReplyDeleteOh - and if you ever want an in depth discussion about Georgette Heyer - just email me.
My husband once suggested, we send a Christmas letter decrying our kids bad grades and attitudes, alluding to their immanent incarceration. This reminds me of that concept. It's real, biting, and hilarious.
ReplyDeleteThanks
wow this is a wonderful story
ReplyDeleteOh my god...you are me...or am I you? We have the same life...kinda...I too, am one of those stay-at-home 'H' words...who has a degree in English Lit (Yay! Milton!) You are definitely going on my blog roll. Thanks for a good read.
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