In which the voices in my head make fun of me on-line

Hello there.

Remember that dearth of snow I was whining about a while ago? Well, we have received an ample supply due to the overwhelming generosity of Mother Nature. And I mean ample. I think somewhere in the area of six to ten inches' worth. (Am I or am I not supposed to use an apostrophe with inches? I've tried it both ways, and both look dumb.)

Enough so that the children's babysitter couldn't get into the driveway.

(Her children have a babysitter? And why is that, exactly? She's a housewife!)

Enough so that the milkman couldn't deliver the milk.

(She has a milkman--isn't that retro of her!)

And my daughter sat glumly munching on a bowl of dry Kix for breakfast. Until the babysitter showed up and voluntarily went back out to buy a gallon of milk at the convenience store.

(Could she be more lame--getting the babysitter to do all the dirty work!)

And it's still falling.

So I'd better get out there and start shoveling. Maybe I'll even figure out how to use that snowblower my husband bought a couple of years ago.

Yeah, it's time to get out there.

(Better get up before your ass takes root!)

Oh yeah? Well, that's easy for you to say, curled up all snug and warm in my cranium--probably drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows, for all I know.

--P.