Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Carolyn Bissette Kennedy has risen from the dead and is dating Nosferatu


Oh, puh-lease
Originally uploaded by Trilby.
You have to love it when you find a photograph that perfectly illustrates what you despise most about two people who have been annoying you for years:

1. Gwyneth, could you please try to look ... I don't know ... different? How in the hell did you get the reputation for being a fashion icon when you look exactly like every other long-bleached-blonde-haired starlet clone? And the aviator shades help a bit, but they can't make that jacket any more cutting edge. And really, a little animation would help, hon. After all, you are an Academy Award-winning actress. So could you stretch yourself and try to act like a human being?

2. Karl, Karl, Karl. Yes, you are livid with rage that Gwyneth looks prettier, younger, and more alive than you do. But let's face it; she's wearing Yet Another Pink Tweed Jacket--like we haven't seen enough of them over the past couple of years--while you have this really fresh Michael Jackson/R2D2 hybrid thing going. So please stop gnawing your face. Yes, the diet is stringent and you are supposed to eat mostly protein, but self-cannibalizing is so 2004 Anorexic-Olson-Twin.

--P.

2 comments:

  1. Karl Lagerfeld is, second only to the loathsome Halston, the pinnacle of all that is evil in the world of Women's High Fashion. It's acceptable, in this day an age, for a man not to be attracted to women. I am mystified why it is desirable for a man to despise* them.

    -Joke

    * Nobody would design such hideous rags if he didn't truly seethe with hatred at women.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Who cares about Carolyn, I'm waiting for my beloved John John to come back.

    Lagerfeld scares me. Bad.

    ReplyDelete

Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.