Friday, September 22, 2006

Everyone else is more interesting than I am.

The Glamorous Redneck is more interesting than I am. Her latest post is about her first time smoking pot. Sort of. Check it out.

You know, I'd like to be more interesting ... maybe I should tell you about the first time I smoked pot, which was five minutes ago.

Oh, wow. I am so high. And I'm totally munched out. I could go for some Doritos right now--how 'bout you?

OK, I lied. I haven't smoked pot in years. Anything neurologically abnormal you've noticed around here can be blamed on alcohol, lack of sleep, and my children.

I'd be all confessional and tell you about the first time I smoked pot, except I've forgotten about it. Smoking pot will do that to you. Joke! Actually, I don't remember the first time I smoked pot because I didn't get high. Or anywhere near high. I didn't get high until I'd smoked pot for a year. I think this is because for months I was smoking the mixture of oregano and mulch that drug dealers routinely sold to 15-year-olds because they could get away with it.

I could tell you about the first time I got high, after a friend of mine scored something that was actually illegal, because that actually was memorable, and I think the statute of limitations has run out by now, so I could avoid arrest. But the silly joke that positively convulsed us after I smoked that joint of actual marijuana? I'm not high at the moment, and the joke doesn't seem to be all that funny.

Tell you what. I'll run it by my kids, and if it makes them laugh, I'll tell you. Judging from the comments I get around here, some of you are as immature and likely to laugh about swearing and farting and dumb jokes as my nine-year-old, or my 13-year-old high-on-pot-for-the-first-time self.

Whoops. Don't look now, but that was a confessional moment. Ooh, I feel so brave and dooce-like! Am I going to get fired?

p.s. Even I'm more interesting than I am. Check out this morning's Mamarazzi post, courtesy of my obsession with monograms.

4 comments:

  1. LOL I wouldn't think of myself as more "interesting" maybe more "stupid" when I was 14.

    But I totally want to hear the story because my sense of humor is perpetually 13.

    ReplyDelete
  2. To think of what I missed in having misspent my youth pursuing demimondaines instead.

    -J.

    ReplyDelete
  3. GR: Actually, I might have killed the brain cells that were supposed to store that story! (Alcohol will do that.)

    Joke: Don't kid yourself. I was doing that, too. (It can be managed, if you're organized.)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Poppiest,

    You are confusing "organization" with "obsession." It'd be safe to say you've met lasers with less focus.

    -J.

    ReplyDelete

Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.