They'll have to pry the lipstick out of my cold, dead hand.
Well, you could get one of those "try this case of wine and get a free, high-tech, impossible to f*c* up corkscrew free with nothing more to buy ever" offers. The corkscrew works wonderfully. You just have to remember to CANCEL the damn subscription after you get it. Six months later? I'm still trying to remember.
You could have planned ahead for this by not getting any orthodontia as a young lass. Then you could do like I do and strain the cork bits through your teeth. It costs a fortune in Crest Whitestrips but, you know, it WORKS.
Cork has fiber. So, not only are you basking in the mood ameliorating effect of ethanol, you're also regular.-J.
Sorry... someone suggested not drinking so much and I just knee-jerked.What was the question?
Gentle Readers: For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.xxx, Poppy.