In years past, our Halloween costumes have been somewhat ... elaborate. Which is a very tactful and understated way of describing the insanity of spending the night before Halloween making a Lisa Simpson wig out of a knit hat, a yellow swim noodle, and a lot of yellow plumber's tape.
At other times we've resorted for the expensive glamor of catalog costumes.
Or put together a Luigi costume with mail-ordered overalls, a silver backpack, a vacuum cleaner hose and a pair of Mickey Mouse hands.
But we were kind of low-key this year.
My daughter wanted to be a pop star. She wanted to wear one of those pre-made costumes, but they don't come in her size. So we used some stuff she already owned, a leopard print hoodie from Delias, some rhinestone-trimmed jeans from eBay, and all the glittery makeup I could dig up. Plus rhinestone sunglasses. And a microphone, in case people didn't get the point.
And my son ... well, he wanted to be John Rowser, the famous bountyhunter.
What's this? You've never heard of John Rowser? Well, of course you haven't. My son made him up. He's one of the dozens and dozens of characters who people the alternate universe my son has invented. They're going to end up a television show, movies, recordings, YouTube videos, video games--you name it. The residuals will have us living on easy street. Eventually.
However, there are still no John Rowser costumes available at the store. Yeah, yeah, yeah, any day now ... I keep checking ... but in the meantime, my son decided to accommodate his rapidly-aging mother and be someone recognizable. Like Zorro.
The fact that we already had a cloak, mask, and black hat in our costume stash had nothing to do with it. I swear.
were the inspiration for this
And I think we did OK.
Although brown shoes with a black outfit? Very bad. And the usual "Glamour Don't" black bar is out of the question, because he's already got a black bar across his eyes.
But frankly, a giant "Z" across each shoe is called for.
Lacking that, I'm simply going to have to confiscate all his Milky Ways.