Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Internet, I have questions.

1. Today is Canada Day. Whenever they play the Canadian National Anthem at a hockey game, I sing "Oh Canada / You're boring, but you're large." Is this offensive?

2. Since Saturday is Independence Day, is it your considered opinion that long underwear is no longer in season?

3. If yes, would you mind mentioning this to the weather?

4. When displeased, my daughter has shown a tendency to remind me that I have a weight problem. (Obviously, she doesn't read my blog, or she'd know that I'm well aware of the fact.) But for the time being, it seems that I'm doomed to be reminded that I'm either "fat" (when she's merely cranky) or "obese" (when a nuclear meltdown becomes immanent.) Would it be childish to start calling her "pimply"?

5. Speaking of obesity, I'm afraid that the local rabbit population has been treating my rose bed like an all-you-can-eat Las Vegas buffet.


The middle row--Jackson Perkins "Whisper" hybrid tea--is obviously the yummiest.


Does anyone have any good recipes for rabbit?

5. Are you going to BlogHer? You're invited to my cocktail party on Saturday, July 25, from 9:00 p.m. to 1:00 a.m. But I can only have 70 people. Wanna come?

8 comments:

  1. Hudson loves to tell me, "Momma, your booty shakin' Momma." He's a little young to be noticing my giant behind.

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  2. #1 IDK if it's offensive, but I'm TOTALLY singing that from now on!!!

    #5 Hoffenpepper.

    The other #5. No, but if I were going I would totally come party with you.

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  3. 1. Only if there are actual Canadians around.

    2. No, it just means your long underwear should be red white and blue.

    3. Take it up with Kristabella, she pissed of mother nature.

    4. I would just start cheerfully reminding her that girls usually end up with their mother's bodies (as I'm horrified to discover on myself).

    5. Turn those bunnies into a stew!

    Um, YES I WANT TO PARTY WITH YOU.

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  4. Tutugirl up there has a good idea for #4. I'd go with it.

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  5. 1. I almost comment on someone's blog about Cananda being America's Hat and then thought it might be offensive...

    2. Style is what you make of it. Mine involves what laundry I tackled. Fortunately, my husband's underwear fits me.

    3. Give her a 'you are what you eat' comment and then nod, knowingly, to that bag of chips she's eating.

    4. (See above) - because I'm a dumbass and can't keep up with 5 numbers apparently.

    5. I generally cause all the leaves to fall off roses myself, thus starving the local rabbit population.

    5. (your second one) - apparently, I'm not the only one with number problems. ;) I WOULD LOVE TO COME! I mean, sign me up, please!

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  6. My husband calls me fat when he's grumpy, too. I call him a drunk, so I think calling your daughter pimply or the more P.C. "complexion impaired" is fine. Just sayin'.
    Oh, and Mr. D is a fair shot with a .22 so if you'd like, I'll send his drunk ass over to shoot up your bunnies.

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  7. Am talking with Angie/Sunshine Susie right now on the phone. She told me to beg you to invite me to your party!!! PLEASE!

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  8. Yes, I want to come! I so want to come!!!

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Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.