Saturday, January 23, 2010

Last year's Christmas card

In case I never got around to sending you one, here's the picture from last year's Christmas card.

Inside the card it said "We hope your Christmas rocks!"

As you can see, it took quite a while to get a picture good enough for a Christmas card:

I know what you're thinking. What kind of narcissist thinks we'd be interested in her Christmas card outtakes?

Hey! This kind of narcissist, that's who.

Actually, I'm not doing it out of ego. I'm doing it so you'll get an idea of what I go through. I spend the whole year trying to get a picture of the four of us looking passably attractive and doing something interesting. And this is a huge challenge, because we're generally sitting around staring into a laptop and looking like dog vomit.

See, I'm not a narcissist. I'm a whore. I want pity, or if not that, empathy.

I mean, those Christmas cards of the entire family looking adorable and perky on a beach somewhere--the little girls in Lilly Pulitzer shifts, the little boys in matching polo shirts ... don't you just hate those people? Please say yes.


  1. I like them all. Is that wrong?

  2. yes. i hate those people and their goddamn matching outfits.

    in other news, I always pictured your son as a smallish child. Why is this? he's a bona fide teenage type. in fact, he's enormous. in a good way. and you are all revoltingly good looking.

  3. Dude. We stopped doing family Christmas card photos when the kids were in preschool. Life is too short, yo.

  4. You do rock! We never match. Well, not on purpose.
    Your kids are handsome.

  5. Hey, change the matching tee shirts for Druid suits (sheets will probably do), and go on 21 June, and you can get those rocks in the foreground for the 2010 card. You could have one or more child laid out just like Tess moments before she was carted off to the gallows.

    Sorry, that probably made no sense. I was just thinking that the only day you can get near Stonehenge these days is on the solstice, and only if you claim to be a Druid.

    There's something not quite Christamsy about your Christmas card...

  6. Yes.

    And I like them all too!

    (AND, I've told you dozens of times what a good looking bunch you are.)

  7. of course i hate those people whose family looks perfect in pictures!

    i am extremely impressed that you have teens/tweens at stonehenge and they don't look miserable. you must be a magical.

  8. I love, nay adore people who show me the outtakes of their Christmas photos! I wrote about this in December and am still delighted to see more.

  9. that guy? has man-boobs.

  10. that tall girl is probably jealous, she has NO boobs.

  11. AND BOW-LEGS.Hope she has a big dowry.

  12. Anonymous: Just so you know, I told the tall girl that she has no boobs and is bow-legged, and she told me to tell you that she has facial hair, chest hair, and a penis.


Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.