WTF, Sephora?

I followed a link from bird's blog to a page full of lovely-sounding oils at Sephora.

While there, I decided to check and see what my 1,170 Sephora points would get me these days.

For anyone who doesn't already know, once you join Sephora's Beauty Insider program, you receive one point for each dollar spent at Sephora. These points don't expire, and can be spent on deluxe samples as well as larger kits of bite-sized products.

Full disclosure: I did not spend $1,170 at Sephora last year. I've banked my points for years, waiting for really good stuff to pop up.

This is what I found today in the larger, 500-point selections:

- Laura Mercier – Foundation Primer - Radiance (0.5 oz)
- SEPHORA COLLECTION – The Mascara - Volume, Length & Definition (0.67 oz)
- Formula X – The Colors in X ♥ Rouge (0.13 oz)
- Buxom – Full-On™ Lip Polish in Dolly (0.05 oz) 

OK, first of all, four products? That's it?

Second, "Night-Out Necessities?"

A primer, mascara, nail polish, and lipgloss might be things I'd use when going out at night, but the implication is that you'd be carrying them in the so-called "clutch," which would never happen.

I don't know about you, but when I go out at night, I tend to carry a small purse, not a shaving kit, and I keep it pared down: my lip color du soir.  A comb. Tissues. Maybe a powder compact.

Definitely a powder compact now that I own this pearl-encrusted beauty from Estee Lauder. I intend to pull that baby out even if my nose doesn't need powdering, just to strike my friends dumb with its beauty.

What I don't carry: nail polish. Or primer, which, hello, goes on first, under the rest of my makeup.

Also, please note that Sephora manufactures Formula X nail polish, so half the offerings are Sephora products.

But enough with this grumpiness! On to the next idiotic 500 point bonus.

 - SEPHORA COLLECTION Express Eye Makeup Remover Wipes (0.101 oz each)
- SEPHORA COLLECTION Colorful Face Powders –  in 05 Sweet On You (0.006 oz)
- Peter Thomas Roth Anti-Aging Cleansing Gel (2 oz)
- Fresh Sugar Advanced Therapy Lip Treatment (0.07 oz)
- Marc Jacobs Fragrances Daisy Eau So Fresh (0.04 oz)
- Dolce&Gabbana Dolce Floral Drops (0.06 oz)
- Origins GinZing™ Refreshing Face Mask (0.24 oz)

OK, this one has seven products, but that's about the only nice thing I have to say.

This one's a "conveniently curated" collection of samples to help out at the gym. Hmm, let's see: two Sephora products, a cleanser, a face mask, a lip balm, and two fragrances.

Color me underwhelmed.

I may be overweight and middle-aged, but I spend a lot of time at the gym, and I can tell you what would be useful at the gym: crap you might have forgotten to pack in your gym bag. Crap you might have forgotten to pack in your purse.

I would suggest: packets of sulfate-free shampoo and conditioner, a small bottle of Micellar water with some of those amazingly soft Japanese cotton squares, tinted SPF lip balm, a BB cream, a hair tie, an emery board, and yes, this would be a great opportunity to sling along a trial-size mascara.

Poppy's theory

I'm using my mighty intellect to deconstruct these kits, and this is what I've got: Sephora has a overabundance of samples. Sephora wants to push its own products. Sephora tells some marketing schmo to find a way to get this stuff out the door. Marketing schmo decides to copy Estee Lauder, ipsy, etc., and plop half a dozen things into a plastic cosmetics bag.

Why Poppy is grumpy

These kits basically represent Sephora's gratitude for having spent $500 at their stores.

Pause for a moment and imagine what you'd get for buying $500 worth of Estee Lauder, Clinique or Lancome, if you shopped intelligently and took advantage of GWP events. Or say you waited and bought your high-end products during a beauty event at Barney's, Bergdorf Goodman, Neiman Marcus, Nordstrom, or Space NK.

You would end up with a suitcase full of samples. I know this from personal experience. How did I get into my current situation with regard to samples? Well, it wasn't shopping at Sephora, I can tell you that.

I'll say it again, because it bears repeating: WTF, Sephora?