Saturday, August 05, 2006

Et tu, Fugly?

What am I, chopped liver?

A. First Jen gets a book contract.

B. And Jen's book comes out, and Jen gets another book contract.

C. And now the Go Fug Yourself girls have a book contract.

I'm starting to feel like the Chicago Cubs. A little respect would be nice. A book contract would be even better.

What I'm saying here is that I would, if asked, be willing to lose my amateur blogging status and go pro. Just so you know. I mean, I don't want it to be one of those things where one acquisitions editor at Random House is saying "You ask her," and another acquisitions editor says "I asked the last one; you ask her," and there is bickering and unhappiness ... I mean, it's all so petty.

Why sit here acting modest? Why not enrich the world with my writing? Don't I owe that much to this magnificent gift of mine? What was that parable--you know the one, about the servant and the talents, or was it the light and the bushel? Or maybe the loaves and the fishes?

So anyway, yes, Random House (or Little Brown, I'm not particular) I would be willing to write a book for you. I know, I know--I'm a busy woman, but really, I would be happy to get paid to sit around and type.

Not to mention promoting the book. Yes, I know promotional tours can be tedious, and I'm really not a morning person, but yes, I'd do the whole talk show circuit, even Good Morning America. So don't be shy--pluck up your courage, for heaven's sake. I don't bite!

9 comments:

  1. I am really sorry you are starting to feel like the Cubs.

    When is your wake?

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  2. I don't know--after last night's game against the formerly hapless Devil Rays (thank you, Stephen King)I might decide I'm the Red Sox, instead.

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  3. Being a "victim" i e a hapless Cubs fan doesn't fit you well

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  4. Good Morning America? Have you no shame?

    I think Craig Ferguson fits you better.

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  5. I've actually never watched Good Morning America. I don't like television very much, and I'm not a morning person, so TV in the morning = a very grumpy Poppy.

    But if my publisher asked me to do it, I would. I'm cooperative that way.

    Are you listening, Random House?

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  6. I think you should hold out for Charley Rose.

    Um... what book??

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  7. RW sent me and since he will be filthy rich soon, you should just hit him up to publish you and promote you...yeah that's the ticket!

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  8. Poppy, I was kidding as I'm known to do too often.

    I never watch TV during the day, either but the very name "Good Morning America" just sounds too perky and wholesome.

    Hope you're living free!

    Oh, great, I got one of those impossible word verifications..

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  9. Laughing with you. As I don't get CBS (home of GMA) very well, and I get NBC (home of the Today show) I vote you go on them.

    Unfortunately, as a librarian, I have no publishing contacts, only vendors, and the ones I deal with are for, ack, cdroms for children.

    Good luck, tho. What would your book be called?

    and for whatever reason, the vw gods are being extra nice to me today. I'll try not to jinx it for the rest of yins.

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Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.