Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Well conducted

My children are trying to kill me.

I mean, it's not like they haven't already tired me out. Especially new teenager Poppette, who sang in a concert tonight and was thoroughly excited and delighted by that ... and twenty minutes later, was home experiencing the depths of despair! And anger! Because she lost a textbook. Honestly, it was two extremes of emotion, height and depth--occurring incredibly fast, like one of those terrifying roller coasters that takes you way up high and then shoots way, way down. And twists. And leaves you hanging upside down. Maybe under water, I don't know. And I know I'm belaboring a cliché, but:

The ride is called Teenaged Girl, and it's coming to a Six Flags near you.

So anyway, now that it's almost midnight and I badly need to be sitting here drinking the one measly glass of wine Weight Watchers will let me have, I can hear her in her bedroom. And she is not asleep. And I'm going to have to go in there and get her to go to sleep or she'll be OTE (over-tired and emotional) tomorrow.

You know, teenagers are just like toddlers. Except with hormones.

OK, you already knew that, too. And so I'm posting this picture of my church choir, taken when we were visiting Salisbury Cathedral last summer.

Because both of my teenagers in that choir, and we're taking another choir trip in a couple of weeks. See how orderly and calm and in control we all look in our blue robes?

DSCN0070

See how lovely? Blue robes. Stained glass. Historic edifices. Beautiful music. Not plummeting to a messy death.

This is also my life. And I just figured out what we need in this house. We need a conductor. Someone to tell us what to do (and, if necessary, divert dangerous electrical charges.)

See, when I'm singing in a chorus, I do what the conductor says. I sit, stand, sing, listen, take careful notes, try to remember everything he has said. And I don't argue about what I'm told to wear. Blue choir robes? Not really my thing. I'm more drawn to the traditional black. And yet, I don't argue; I just wear the stupid thing. And it's also effective with teenagers. See the kids in the picture? They adore our conductor and do everything he says.

Is it possible to hire a conductor for something other than a musical performance? Because I'm sure that Mr. Buxom would agree that it would be a distinct improvement if someone else were in charge around here once in a while.

5 comments:

  1. If you find a good one, let me know. We can share him. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I
    am
    the person you seek.
    And, coincidentally, I am coming to visit and stay with you.
    Say no more: I shall CONDUCT.

    ReplyDelete
  3. So will it help that my daughters are in the choir? They are 8 & 9, and already have periods of excessive emotion, so I'm counting on choir to be one of the things that calms them down.

    ReplyDelete
  4. and that is why I have so thoroughly embraced yoga. I go, I sit, I bend, I stretch, I hold, I breathe-eeeeeeee. I downward dog, I plank, I child pose.

    All because someone at the front of the room tells me to.

    Now, I could go out and rent/buy a DVD and do all those things at home, minus the overcrowded/overheated dimly lit beautifully painted in quieting chilled out hues, but then I would get lazy and bored and give up.

    So, I go, and I do and I am OM.

    I think that's what conducting is all about. Just going and listening and doing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't understand why people don't hire nannies for teens.

    ReplyDelete

Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.