Monday, January 11, 2010

Ten questions for ADBPBT. And the rest of you.

1. Why does the Christmas carol say "In the deep midwinter?" We celebrate Christmas right after the solstice, when things are just getting started.

2. I have tiny, kangaroo-like, almost-vestigial hands, but my feet are like ping pong paddles. Did my parts get somehow mixed up, and if so, can I exchange the feet?

3. Is it normal to have Fear of Decorating?

4. Have I lost weight?

5. I go to the dentist twice a year. Why do I always think of it as a "fresh hell?"

6. Do all husbands snore, or is it just mine?

7. Why do so many southerners fear cold, and is this related to my fear of palmetto bugs?

8. Where did I stash the big bag of Mamarazzi t-shirts?

9. Has Paris Hilton really gone away?

10. Was last night's Simpsons 20 Year Anniversary Special as lame as I thought? Or is Morgan Spurlock not as insightful as he thinks he is?

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7 comments:

  1. Methinks Mr. Spurlock is a wee bit overrated.

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  2. I have no comment on your hands or feet since I've never met you, but I believe we're all pretty harsh when it comes to criticizing ourselves.

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  3. What the heck is ADBPBT? All Dumb Broads Protest Bra Tyranny? That's all I could come up with.

    And in "A Midsummer Night's Dream," "midsummer" refers to the 21st of June (the summer solstice). Apparently the same reasoning applies to mid winter (and, really, it makes sense - after 21 Dec, the days get longer and we are heading toward spring).

    I think all husbands snore. Just to torture us...

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  4. If you find a way of switching out body parts, let me know. I've been convinced that somebody gave me the wrong ass for years now.

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  5. I am a southerner who also has #3 and #7!

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  6. I am so distracted by how much weight you lost, that I forgot the other questions.

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  7. Exactly, who cares about anything else if you lost weight!
    (and I am saying this without ever having met you, so as a general rule)
    Paola

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Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.