Thursday, March 04, 2010

30 Days to 10 years younger--10 minute tips. Tip 3: Triage

OK, the whole thing started because I was working on a video about eyebrows. Yes, like Badger, I was thinking about dipping a toe into the growing field of vlogging.

So I was in the bathroom applying eyebrow powder and talking to myself in the mirror. You know, practicing. Suddenly I realized that I needed to drop off my daughter's lunch at school. And that the lunch bell was going to ring at 12:05. And that it was 11:55. And while my eyebrows were looking particularly fetching, the rest of me was still in my pajamas.

My daughter's school is a five minute walk away. Which gave me one minute to get dressed, two minutes to fix lunch, and two minutes to clean up my act.

The two minutes to fix lunch was easy. I put together a PB&J sandwich, a snack-sized bag of Doritos, a container of chocolate pudding, and an orange.

Then I spent the same amount of time cleaning up my act in case a teacher or another mom snagged me after I dropped off lunch. And I realized that I was just as fast and efficient at getting ready as I was at making lunches. It's because I had the cosmetics equivalent of snack-sized bags of Doritos ready to go.

My first step was to wipe my face with my son's Stridex Daily Care Maximum pads. Despite their tough anti-acne talk, they're actually just little wipes soaked in a gentle salicylic acid solution. There's no Benzoyl Peroxide or alcohol or anything harsh like that. They're a step more thorough than a cotton ball with toner--perfect for a quick clean up.

Then I applied a pea-sized blob of Garnier Nutritioniste Daily Moisture Lotion SPF 28 all over my face

and finished with a fast slick of my beloved Revlon ColorStay Lipglaze in Infinite Rose.
Then I disguised the rest of me with some clothes, my favorite black puffy jacket, black and gray fingerless gloves, a gray wool beanie over my disheveled locks, and a pair of sunglasses.

And shot out the door at the speed of light.

The lesson? We all need to figure out the one or two products that will make us look at least halfway presentable time we're incredibly time-crunched. (I'm aware that the phrase "time-crunched" usually does not denote a housewife talking to herself in the bathroom--but bear with me.) At our age, looking good takes planning. There are products out there that can make us look 100 percent better--and in almost no time at all. For me, the crucial thing is lip color. I'm deeply unhappy when I'm caught without it, so I try to always have something handy, even if it's just Cherry Chap-Stick.

I don't sweat my eye makeup nearly as much, probably because I always have glasses on. Everybody's different. Your first priority might be concealer, mascara, or eyebrow color.

Do you know your first priorities? Have you figured out a three minute system? If not, you should figure it out. Because I'm here to tell you, a combination of fuzzy PJs and impeccably filled brows doesn't cut it.


  1. Eyebrows and lips. I've added eyeliner because I like the definition and I feel like I can skip mascara if I use it. But I swear that sometimes even these three little things can take forever. And then I wish there was such a thing as this makeup gun that Homer Simpson invented:

  2. moisturizer, concealer, mascara, a bit of eyeliner on the upper lid (I like an olive green color by mac).

    Swipe of lipstick on the way out the door.

    Hair...that's a whole 'nuther story. I have to wash it in the morning, I can't go out with bed head. I look like a hedgehog pulled backwards thru a log....

  3. Concealer for the previously mentioned bags under the eyes, and my favorite Maybelline lipstick, though I am loving that color that you have shown! It's very close to MLBB for me.

  4. Clean face and concealer is the bare (heh) minimum for me. A delicate flower such as myself is prone to particularly think undereye skin so concealer is key. I really prefer to complete my day without anyone thinking that I am going for the heroin chic look.

    I have not found a single lipstick/gloss/balm that I can tolerate. I love how I look with lipstick on but it always feels thick and sticky.

  5. Definitely going to have to try that lipglaze. As Middle Aged Woman said, it looks very close to MLBB. Yummy!

  6. Mascara and cherry chapstick, clear gloss... every day like a monkey.

  7. You've been the messiah this week.

    Because of you, I purged my closet.

    Then I discovered that I have sperm eyebrows and need to deal with them.

    And then today I actually wore lipstick.

  8. Okay, you are no longer allowed to watch my vlogs. Or at least, you are not allowed to look at my eyebrows while you watch them. I don't need that kind of pressure, man.

    (I can do a COMPLETE face in under 3 minutes with that L'Oreal loose mineral stuff - base, concealer & blush - a swipe of Bonne Bell Dr. Pepper lipsmacker, mascara and powder-filled brows. But I'm a chronic oversleeper and have had loads of practice.)

    Oh, AND! My boy child uses Stridex but it's the one all full of stuff that gives me chemical burns -- I had no idea this other kind existed! Will now seek it out. TY!

  9. Mascara, concealer, lip balm--but now tinted thanks to your advice.


Gentle Readers:

For the time being, I've turned off comment moderation. Please don't spam; it's not nice.

xxx, Poppy.