Friday, February 04, 2022

The slow gray fox

 OK, with the ongoing pandemic, I think I can be forgiven for losing track of time and letting my blog go moribund ... again.

But I decided that the internet deserved an update, so here I am.

First of all, that idea that one's hair grows at the rate of a half inch a month/six inches a year is either a crock of shit, or I am a mutant. Because as thoroughly documented on this very blog, the last time I had my hair colored was March 17, 2020, which means we're coming up on two years. And my hair hits pretty much at my shoulders. And the bottoms two or three inches are still dyed.

You know that old saw about the drapes matching the carpet? I think I'm living a version of that for post-menopausal women.

Here's an illustration.

OK, it's a screenshot that I took after I finished my FaceTime workout with my trainer, so my hair is in a pony tail. I'm also sitting in front of a window, and the camera in my laptop isn't the greatest. So as proof that I deserve to whine to the internet about my hair, it sucks.

My point is that CLEARLY the top of my head is gray, whereas the bottom of my ponytail is still brown and WHEN THE FUCK IS THIS GOING TO BE OVER.

I mean, it's not like I have a neck like Cynthia Nixon. I can't blame my vertebrae. 

On the bright side, if my hair (or part of it) is still brown, at least so are my eyebrows. 

P.S. A picture like this shows off my strabismus to great effect. I never realized that my eyes are slightly wonky until I started taking selfies. I used to be a little self-conscious about it, but then I decided that I'm in good company, what with Kristen Bell and all. 

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Gentle Readers:

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xxx, Poppy.